What If? The Returning
by lovelybella
Summary: What if Bella never jumped on her own? She tried, but never succeeded. Who came to her rescue? And what if Edward saw that Bella was okay? So, he never went to Italy. Then what?Takes place in the middle of New Moon. After Edward's leaving...
1. Can't No More

My First **_What If?_** **A Collection of REALLY Short Stories!**

Okay here's the first chapter! It's short, unlike my other story! Lolz! Can't afford another long BOOK now can we? Okay, read on!

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_**What If?**_ **A Collection of REALLY Short Stories: The Returning**

**Summery:** What if Bella never jumped on her own? She tried, but never succeeded. Who came to her rescue? And what if Edward saw that Bella was okay? So, he never went to Italy… Then what?

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It been months since he left me. Told me I wasn't good enough for him, that he didn't want me. It crushed me deep down inside, and just by looking at me, you could tell I was broken, lifeless.

His words rang in my memory, every waking moment in this horror I call life. No, existence, life is something I like. I know how much this has killed Charlie, how much it pained him to see me like this.

I never told him the truth. And I feel so bad about it. When the police officer came ad found me, I ended up telling Charlie, that _I_ left Edward, that _I_ didn't want to go with him, that I was content where I was, without him.

It killed me inside, to tell such a horrible lie, because it was completely and revoltingly untrue. I _need_ him like there's no tomorrow, _love_ him to no world's end, _want _to go wherever he is, to be around him. But he's gone, and I have to deal with this on my own.

It's been months since he left. It's now May, and I have been chosen as Valedictorian. No shocker there, once _he_ left, all I could do was come home, cook dinner, and work really hard on my grades and work.

I passed all my midterms and finals with flying colors, and was to graduate soon.

It was one Friday morning, and I was strolling around the neighborhood, with no care, just walking, trying to free my mind, and my thoughts. I didn't feel like going to school, so I didn't. It's not like, I'm failing, its healthy to cut class ever once in a while.

I walked, and walked, and finally, came to a stop. I looked up to see where my feet had bought me, and gasped. I was at.. I had reached… I was in front of… I couldn't even manage to say that I had _somehow_ walked, (without knowing) to _their_ house. No… I couldn't be.

I forgot the way, well, I tried to, but deep down I knew I never could…

I freaked out, and ran behind the closest tree, afraid to find something I couldn't handle right now. I realized that this was completely stupid, because they weren't here, and nothing bad could happen, right?

I moved from behind that big tree trunk, which was about two or three times wider and bigger than me. I walked to the beautiful house I've always known and loved, and stopped at the door. I took the knob in my hands, and turned it, without thinking. It didn't and I realized, how stupid that would have been if it opened on its own, without a key. But then I tried again, and it opened surprisingly. I gasped, and I walked inside, only to find everything the way it was.

The only thing that was different was that the house was very dusty, very unlike how Esme would keep it.

I walked around. First the living room, then the kitchen, the study, and back out the hallway. I froze when I saw it. It took me everything I had not to break down right then and cry, so I walked over to it, and sat down. I thought of everything. How I inspired my lullaby, how _he_ played for me, how Esme's face flooded with love and happiness at her sight and sound of her son playing, how _he_ would never mind to sit down and play, anything, a couple of notes and chords, just to make me happy. A couple tears escaped my eyes, and sailed down my face. I haughtly wiped at them with my sleeve, not willing to cry. I got up, looking away from the piano in disgust, and sadness.

I walked up the stairs, not knowing where I was going, just letting my feet take me where they wanted to go. I walked. Past Alice's room, Rose's room, the study, and Carlisle's office. The last room was where I knew I wanted to be. I ended up right in front of _his_ room.

I opened the door, and stepped in, everything the same way he left it. I closed the door behind me, and fell down in a pile of sobs. I cried and cried, like I could cry no more, and somehow ended up crawling to the corner of the room, bawling in a ball. Half way into the crying, I got up and went over to the stereo, where I put on some music, and cried some more.

"WHY?!" I screamed at no one. "WHY?! Why'd you leave me?! You broke me! Tore me apart! Took my heart and then ripped it to pieces, into ashes, and burned it! You might as well have killed me!" I screamed out, probably looking like a psychopath.

"You left me! " I yelled out in tears. "And I still love you…" I said the last part in a complete whisper…

I cried and cried, until I cried myself to sleep…..

I awoke the next day, hungry, and went down into the kitchen. I looked through the fridge. Empty. Only a couple water bottles were left in the fridge. The cabinets were pretty much empty too, with the exception of a couple cracker boxes and cookies. I remembered that these were bought from when _they _were still here.

I took the bottle of water, and the box of crackers, and headed out the kitchen. Something shiny caught my eye, though. I placed the stuff on the kitchen island, and walked over to my fate.

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Hmmm... I wonder. What's her fate? Any guesses?

-lovelybella


	2. Fallen

What If? A Collection of REALLY Short Stories: The Returning

Summery: What if Bella never jumped on her own? She tried, but never succeeded. Who came to her rescue? And what if Edward saw that Bella was okay? So, he never went to Italy… Then what?

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_Bella, don't. Please, don't. _His voice hung through the air. I knew that whenever I did something dangerous, I heard _him_. I heard _him_ trying to protect me. Yeah, right. Then he wouldn't have left. 

I held onto the end of the knife, the safe side of it. Ha. I laughed at the irony. There was no safe side in the object I held in my hands. I looked at the object for a while, studied it, thought about it, and decided. If he's not going to be here, then I don't need to live, because I can't live without him.

_Please, Bella. I'm begging you. Don't do this._ He said.

"Well you know what Edward?! If you don't want me to do this, then why'd you leave me?! You're causing me to do this! You!" I yelled.

I held the blade to my stomach, the point killing to get into my skin. I decided to close my eyes and count to three, and did just that. I closed my eyes, took a couple of deep breaths, and counted down.

(_**This is Bella, thinking.**__ This is Edward, thinking. She hears his voice…)_

_**Breath…**_

_No…!_

"One."

_**Breath…**_

_Bella! NO!_

"Two."

_**Breath…**_

_Please, don't do it! No! Bella!!!_

"Th-." I never got to finish 'three' because just then the phone rang, and I jumped, startled, and dropping the knife, only to cut my wrist dropping it.

"SHIT!" I took a wash cloth from the kitchen counter, and applying pressure on the now deep cut, I rang to the phone. I stood before it, ringing, deciding whether or not to answer it. The caller I.D. said, Unknown. I picked it up and listened.

"Hello?" I asked in a whisper.

"Don't." The voice said. "Please don't." It was a light whisper, begging me. It wasn't clear enough to know whether it was a boy or a girl on the other line, but it sounded somewhat familiar.

"Who is this?" I asked, my voice again, a faint whisper.

"Stay safe Bella." The voice said, and quickly hung up before I could ask who it was and why they knew my name.

I went back into the kitchen, only to find the knife gone. I knew that it fell on the floor, but I hadn't moved it from there. I looked around to see if there were any more blades around the kitchen, but whatever I found before, was now gone. I sighed in defeat, and took the food that I found, sitting down and eating it.

I looked at the kitchen clock. It was Sunday already. Dawn. The beginning of a new day. A lonely day. A day without meaning to exist. Then I remembered. _Charlie._ Oh crap! I had forgotten to call and tell him where I was. He must be worried sick about me.

I decided to pretend to sleepover at Angela's. Charlie wouldn't suspect to call her, I hope.

I went over to the phone, and picked up, called Charlie's house and waited for him to answer.

"Hello?!" Charlie asked in a worried and panicked voice.

"Hello, Mr. Swan?" I asked, in a voice I hoped didn't sound like me.

"Yes...?" Charlie said, hesitantly.

"This is Angela Webber. I'm Bella's friend. Bella came over yesterday, and she seemed very troubled. She was suppose to go home after coming over, but she fell asleep and I felt bad for her so I let her sleep over. She was suppose to call last night, but I think she forgot. I'm terribly sorry we couldn't have contacted you earlier." I said.

"She's safe! Oh thank god! I was worried sick, I had the whole station looking for her!" Charlie said. _Ouch._

"Yes, she's fine. Can she stay her till Sunday, before school starts? It might do her good if she talks with someone, she's opening up to me a bit." I asked, hoping my voice wasn't giving away anythign.

"Well, I don't know." Charlie said. _I knew it._ But he continued. "Do you know why she wasn't at school today? The school called. Told me she wasn't there."

"She said something abouot not feeling well. I didn't go to school either. It could be the flu or something of the sort. Don't worry Chief Swan, she's fine." I said, wanting to end this conversation now.

"Okay, thank you Angela. I'm glad she has such a great friend like you. Make sure she comes home on Sunday." Charlie said.

"She's still sleeping at the moment, and she seemed tired lately, I don't want to wake her up. I'm terribly sorry once again, Chief Swan." I said. Charlie sighed.

"Are you a 100 positive she's safe?" Charlie asked, worry etched in his tone.

"Yes, Chief Swan. She's safe." I replied. Crap, now I have to call Angela and tell her what happened.

"Yes, well, good bye then, I must go to work. Tell everyone to stop looking…" Charlie said, sighing in the background.

"OH! Chief Swan!?" I said, wanting to say one last good bye to Charlie.

"Yes?" Dad asked.

"Bella has a message for you." I said. "She said, I love you, and I'm sorry." I said.

"Sorry for what?" Charlie asked.

"I'm sorry." I said once more, before hanging up.

The last thing I heard was "Wait, sorry for what?! Tell me!" Charlie said.

Trying my best not to break down in tears, I called Angela.

"Hello?" She picked up on the third ring.

"Angela?" I said.

"Bella?! Is that you? Where are you? You didn't go to school yesterday, where are you calling from?" Her concerned voice as a friend, shattered what was left of my heart, forcing me to see that people still cared…

"Yea, I'm fine Angela." I lied. "I just… Ineededadayoff.Icalledmydad.IpretendedIwas you.Hemightcallyou,justtobesure,maybejustto hearmyvoice.Ican'tanymore,Angela.I can't!" I said in one big breath, really fast before I broke down in tears.

Translation: (I just… I needed a day off. I called my dad. I pretended I was you. He might call you again, just to be sure, maybe just to hear my voice. I can't anymore, Angela. I can't!)

"Whoa, Bella, slow down. Listen tell me where you are. I'll come get you, and we can talk…" Angela said, but I cut her off.

"Angela, I… just listen to me! I don't have much time. He sent out the entire station looking for me. I'm safe I assure you please, trust me when I say that, but I can't do this anymore. I can't pretend to be happy when I'm not. It hurts too much, and I cant hurt anyone of you. Please, I need time. Just till Sunday.." I begged Angela.

"Bella! Where are you?!" Angela asked.

"Please, Angela. Promise!" I begged.

"No, not until you tell me where you are! And why you lied to your father!" Angela said.

"I'm fine. I can't tell you where though. I'm stepping out for some air; maybe do something crazy for once in a while. I'm tired of being safe, I want to do something my own way. If the chief calls, tell him I was sick, and you were too. Tell him I plan to stay there till Sunday. And I stepped out." I said, getting ready to hang up. If I talked anymore, I wouldn't be able to do what I needed to do.

"Let me help you, please, just wait for me at your house!" Angela begged. Why did the last person I was going to talk to, have to be so damn kind?!

"NO! Look I'm fine, I just need to get out of here! I can't talk this damn place anymore. I want to leave, I don't want to exist, I want to DIE." I said, emphasizing the last word.

"Bella, please, don't talk like that. Please, tell me where you are, we can talked this through. I want to help you!" Angela said.

I had to end this now. "You all do don't you! You all want to be one's who get me out of my depressed zombie trance! Don't you! It's all about you, isn't it! What about me?! What if you cared about what _I_ want?!? Why does everyone know what's best for _ME_?!?" I yelled into the phone.

"Bella…" Angela said.

"NO! I'm sorry, but I don't deserve this anymore. I don't deserve life. Don't look for me, you'll never find me. Just pray, that I make it up there. I'll always love you Angela, you were a true friend, here in Forks. Goodbye, and see you in many years, hopefully.." I said, and started to take the phone and put it back onto its base. As I did so, I heard Angela call out one more time.

"Bella, no! Please, don't-." And the line went dead. I took the phone and smashed it against the floor, making sure it was permanently destroyed. I quickly ran upstairs, falling and bruising myself a bunch of times. I had to make this quick, and get out of here before they come looking for me.

I ran into Ed- _his_ room, and threw all the cds onto the floor, destroying them completely. I threw the lamp against the wall, the pictures of us in frames onto the floor and some against the wall, shattering completely. Blood went everywhere, because of my now open and even deeper and bigger cut. Some shards of glass from the lamp grazed my skin and cut it open, the red thick liquid pouring out.

After destroying pretty much everything in his room, except for his radio, and realizing that there was so much blood splattered all over the place, I stopped, and exited the room in a hurry. I ran down the stairs, falling down the last five or six steps, and tumbling down, breaking a rib and busting my head open in the process on the piano, leaving a bunch of blood on the keys and the case of it.

I tried to ignore the smell of the blood, and blocked air from my nose, breathing in deeply with my mouth. Knowing that if I tried to breath I'd mostly likely faint, and then wake up hours later at a hospital bed, labeled as "suicidal" and disappoint everyone I know and love, so I ran out the door.

I ran through the woods as fast as my little legs could take me, somehow running faster than I ever have in my life, as if the spirit was pushing me forward.

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A/N: I deleated and rewrote this chapter. I didn't like it before. Any idea next. Shes gonna fall off the cliff, but then what? Do you want her to die, or no?

REVIEW!


	3. Blackout

_Chapter 2_

_BLACKOUT_

_I ran through the woods as fast as my little legs could take me, somehow running faster than I ever have in my life, as if the spirit was pushing me forward. _

At the same time:

Angela's POV

Why? Why would she want to do that? Run away? But… could... oh my, could her life really be that bad? Just because, well why? Is Chief Swan abusive? No, I highly doubt that... Maybe its because of Edward. God knows how crushed she was when he left. I have to… Oh my, I have to call Chief Swan! Right now! Before she hurts herself!

I rushed to the phone, seeing as I had been pacing nearby, and quickly dialed Bella's home.

"Hello?" A worried voice asked. "Bella! Is that you?" Bella's father asked.

"Chief Swan? This is Angela Webber, a friend from school." I said, remembering that Bella had told me that she had pretended she was me, and called Chief Swan.

"Did you not just call me, Ms. Webber?" Chief Swan asked.

"Umm…." I didn't know what to say. Tell him the truth, or lie. If I told him the truth then Bella's plan would go down the drain, and she might be found and forced to live in misery again. If I lied, Bella could get seriously hurt and disappoint us all. And all over a guy? But then again, if Ben had left me, I would be in a cationic state too. She loves him. I conclude. And I love Ben. Love makes people do imaginable things. Lie? Truth? Lie? Truth?

Which ever I picked, it would hurt Bella in one way or another…

"No." I said, hoping I made the right choice.

"Excuse me? I don't seem to understand. Then… who was that.. that called-…. Oh my god! Bella! I'm sorry Ms. Webber, but did Bella call you? Did she tell you anything?" Chief Swan asked, frantic and worried.

I sighed. I feel so bad. "Yes, Chief Swan. She did, and she said… she told me… oh Bella…" I sighed, breaking down into sobs.

"What?! What did she tell you?!" Chief Swan asked.

"She… sob… said that… sob… she can't anymore and… sob… that she wanted to get out of… sob… here… that she hated this place… sob… and… and…" I couldn't finish my sobbing sentence.

"And what?! Tell me, what else did she say!?!" Chief Swan asked.

"She said she wanted to DIE!" I yelled, breaking down into tears, salty water cascading down my face, drowning my eyes with their bitterness.

I fell and blacked out, barley making out the screaming on the other line of the phone.

_Go…_

_Help her…_

These words, were my last wishes, before I let the darkness effulge me.

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Yes, it is short. I'm sorry……..

Um, yes, hi. I have half a mind to shoot myself in the head for having the GUTS to submit this chapter, a year after. Well here's the thing. And I will not lie to you all. So, I broke my arm, yes, you heard that. And then, well I moved. To Europe. (Croatia, to be exact) On punishment. (Why Europe, you ask?)

Well, I was born there. And I have family there, so my parents thought it was smart to do so. And in the process my laptop was taken away from me.

I just returned 2 months ago, (and I have come to the extent that my 8 month trip was not a punishment, but a getaway while my arm healed; supposedly, Europe offers better medical services… :S) and am back into business. Bear with me while I get my English accent back, and TRY to make up my school year that's now down the drain.

Thank you, that's all I can say. Thank you to those who haven't forgotten me.

-lovelybella

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